Mega Church Children's Ministies - Give The Little Kiddies A Good Time And Slip Your Insidious Doctrine In On The Side

Wii Love JESUS - Kids Encounter 2011 from Austin Power House Church on Vimeo.
Mega Church Kiddie  Recipe 
Ingredients: 
Excitement (cartoon tempo)
Peer Pressure
Sense of Belonging
Free Atmosphere To Release Aggressions
Forgiveness
Jesus
Rock and Roll
Shady Looking Dude

Instructions:
1. Let the kids leave the boring adult service and go to a side room where a stage, rock band and lots of props are available.
2. Teach kids using contemporary kid's lingo so you look cool.  (If needed, interrogate your own kids to find out this generation's identifying lingo)
3. Keep the excitement level high to keep the little Kiddies' interests.
3 Eventually work in the doctrine of sin and forgiveness.
4. Play some rock and roll.
5. Teach kids how to fall and catch each other.
6. Just when all the hormones are flowing, play some emotional "God is Awesome,  come to Jesus just as you are music."
7. Get one kid to hold their hands up in the air, and pray for him.  Put pressure on his forehead and encourage all the others who learned to catch in step 5 to get behind him.  Peer Pressure will make him fall down (slain in the Spirit)
8. Other kids will follow suit like domino's
9. Excited kids return to parents in the main meeting, who are amazed at the stories and dump mega cash in blank unmarked "KFC' buckets.
10. Kiddies' minister get's his salary and operating budget.